Social Dance Etiquette and Niceties
- Dec 31, 2022
- 1 min read
Updated: Jan 2, 2023
Please note that the following was written pre-covid. However, this information is timeless and will always apply in a social dance setting. Should you feel most comfortable wearing a mask in a social dance setting at a DWTDS event, please absolutely do so!
Click the arrow next to the topics below to expand that section.
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ACCEPTING AND/OR DECLINING A DANCE
When you ask someone to dance, be sure to make eye contact with your prospective partner, offer your hand, and ask clearly, “Would you like to dance with me?” If your partner says yes, smile, offer your hand and escort him or her on to the dance floor and into dance position. This will make your partner feel supported and at ease.
When someone asks you to dance, your response should be, “Yes thank you, I’d love to.” In a social dance environment, it is customary to say “yes: when someone asks you to dance. For dancing to be a joyous activity, it is important that social dancers are supportive and kind to each other at all skill levels.
When to say no...
When a person asks you to dance, it is appropriate to say no if you have danced with this person before and he or she has been physically or verbally abusive. It is also appropriate to say no if the person is obviously drunk or threatening in some way. If you feel that a dancer is physically dangerous to the other dancers, you should report the situation immediately to a member of staff.
When not to say no...
Unless someone is truly offensive, it is not appropriate to say no because your partner may have still be developing their dance technique. While dancing with this person may not be considered wonderful for your from a dance perspective, this should be considered an opportunity to deliver a wonderful experience to a newer dancer, and complete the cycle that you were a part of when you started dancing. Remember too, if you do say no to one partner, do not accept an offer to dance with anyone else for that dance, as that can feel particularly hurtful.
ROTATING PARTNERS AT A GROUP CLASS AND/OR DANCE
In a social dance situation where there are combined singles and couples, it is appropriate to dance with a variety of people. It is generally poor dance etiquette to partner up and dance with the same person all evening long. Naturally, some people will prefer certain dance partners to others, but this should not prevent them from accepting an offer to dance from a new person. If the same person asks you to dance repeatedly, for several dances in a row, it is acceptable to tell that person, “Thank you, but I’d like to meet and dance with some other people for a while. I’ll be happy to dance with you again later in the evening”.
In addition, it has been proven that you will learn to dance 30% faster by dancing with a variety of partners. Sometimes, in our group classes and at social dances, we have you rotate. Be sure to say hello and introduce yourself to your new partners.
For dancing to be the fun activity that it is, it is important that social dancers are supportive and kind to each other no matter what level the dancer is at. You should never refuse to rotate to a particular partner because you don’t think that person is good enough. Everyone needs to grow and learn. Rotating partners enhances your dancing.
HOW TO TREAT YOUR DANCE PARTNER
While dancing, be sure to be aware of your partner. Smile 😁, and make eye contact, but don’t stare. It is fun to dance with a partner who is gracious and appreciative. Leaders- at the end of the dance ALWAYS say 'thank you' to your partner and begin to escort them off the floor, Followers- always say thank you.
Your job is to make the person you are dancing with look good. For leads this means being conscientious of your partner’s skill and adjusting your lead to the situation. For follows this means avoiding back-leading or other actions that make the lead feel “unimportant.” For both, if you stay aware and adaptive of your partner’s feelings, you will be a popular dancer. It is not necessary to apologize to your partner if a particular move is not executed perfectly. The point is not to have a perfect dance, but to have fun. However, if your mistake may have physically hurt your partner, please apologize and make sure they are okay.
Social dancing is pure fun. This fun can be dampened by a snobbish, superior attitude and/or any kind of lack of consideration for your fellow dancers. A social dance is not a dance competition – your job is not to be the best-looking dancer on
the floor but to connect with each partner in a way that is supportive and enjoyable for both of you. Partner dancing is not a performance, and it is not about winning or losing. It's an activity where success is measured upon the enjoyment for your partner, resulting in your own fulfilment. Above all, it should be fun, and will enable you to share your love of dancing and music with another person.
Advanced dancers- you were a beginner once too! And for all dancers- don’t judge other dancers by their looks, age, skill level, etc.- everyone has the potential to be a great dance partner- the point is to get out on the dance floor and dance!
WHAT or WHAT NOT to WEAR & HYGIENE TIPS
What we wear is important as we learn to dance, and there are some guidelines to ensuring that it is enjoyable for everyone. Modest attire (think "G" rating at all DWTDS events), such as, a long or short sleeved shirt and slacks, skirt, dress or slacks and a blouse or top that can be comfortably moved in, without being hot. Dance shoes are not required, any smooth-soled, non-marking shoe is great.
Tank tops, shorts, and flip flops are not suitable for Ballroom dance. (tank tops simply because not every lead wants to place their hand in the followers uncovered, and potentially sweaty, armpit area 🫥)
Good hygiene shows respect and consideration for the other dancers. Dancers should bathe, use deodorant, use breath mints, and wear clean clothes that will not be too hot. Some dancers sweat a great deal while dancing. In this case, it is considerate to bring a towel and/or change of clothes. If you find yourself getting too sweaty on the dance floor, you should stop, dry off, and cool down for a few minutes. Your partner will thank you for it. Dancers should also use a light touch applying perfume or cologne. Some people may be very sensitive to fragrances.
FLOOR CRAFT
(See diagram below)
Many ballroom dances MOVE around the floor. To enable safe dancing, dancers should follow the line of dance: the counterclockwise direction of dance around the dance floor. The diagram on the right indicates the rules for the dance floor. By following this convention, all the different dancing skill levels can enjoy dancing on the floor at the same time. When not dancing, move well away from the dance traffic.
1 - Outside lane: for couples comfortable with the dance style and tempo. Do not stop or dance across the flow of traffic. Be aware of other dancers to avoid collisions! Dances which progress around the line of dance are Waltz, Tango, Foxtrot, Samba, Viennese Waltz, Quickstep, Two Step and Polka.
2 - Inner Lane: for couples practicing new steps or executing steps performed in counter direction. Forward movement is the line of dance.
3 - Floor Center: for couples dancing in place or who need to stop from time to time while practicing new steps. In place dances and steps include Cha-cha, Rumba, Jitterbug, Lindy Hop, Salsa, slow dancing, free style, West Coast Swing, spot turns, fleckerels, position or dance poses. Please do not execute in-place steps in the outside lane.
QUICK RECAP / TIPS
DWTDS is a ballroom dance studio oriented toward people who would like to have fun while learning to dance. We strive to create a welcoming environment for beginning and experienced dancers. As part of that effort the following guidelines will help make your time in-studio, at a social dance and/or group class a positive experience.
The best cologne is soap and water.
Men and women: Do not hesitate to ask someone to dance.
Do not be a teacher.
It is good form to accept a dance with anyone who asks unless you have a very good reason not to.
If you collide, offer a smile.
Always try to dance with a wide variety of dance partners at a social dance event. Dancing with someone besides your partner will strengthen the leads leading skills and enhance the followers following skills.
A strong lead is measured by how decisive your movement is, not by physical pressure in your hands or dance frame.
In partner dancing, there can ONLY be one lead. It is implied that the follower will follow and allow the leader to lead, and the leader will lead with clarity.
Always thank your partner.
The proximity between dance partners in a frame should be dictated by the follower, and always to their own level of comfort.
For your safety, no bare feet are allowed on the ballroom dance floors. We do recommend that you purchase dance shoes, however, it is not required. Any non-marking, smooth soled shoe should work.
It is impolite to monopolize a partner.
More on Dance Etiquette:
LINE OF DANCE 'MAP":

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